As all human beings well know, desire is a powerful and inescapable force. It’s how we handle that desire that determines the course of our lives.
In the western world, we embrace desire. We’ve mastered the art of manufacturing, marketing and at least temporarily satisfying just about any desire under the sun. And while that’s made us the richest society in history, we’re woefully short on the only commodity that matters: inner peace. On the other hand, eastern spiritual traditions reject desire, viewing it as a manifestation of ego and a source of suffering. Only by taming and overcoming our desires, they say, can we finally know inner peace.
You might presume that I support the eastern perspective on desire, but I don’t find either approach very practical. Why? Because characterizing all desire as bad is a gross simplification of a complex phenomenon. Without desire, there is no personal or spiritual growth.
Whether you want to become enlightened, change the world, or just get in shape, it’s the wanting that makes it happen. Let’s take a closer look at desire and find a practical synthesis between eastern and western perspectives- one which actually works in the context of our lives.
Redefining Desire: Cultivating the Conscious, Eliminating the Unconscious
Part of the confusion is in the word “desire” itself, which in spiritual circles refers only to those desires spawned from unconsciousness. In this context, desire invariably refers to the Big Four: money, materials, fame, and sex. They represent the thought impressions we’ve passively absorbed our entire lives- the same thought impressions that compel whole societies to live at the whim of the ego. The result is the chaotic, greedy, unconscious world that surrounds us.
What would happen if humans had the power to eliminate all but their most noble, empowering, conscious desires? What if even one person could live such a life?
Only meditation has the power to raise our consciousness to such a degree that the self-defeating and unconscious desires no longer sway us. So long as the ego is in control, it’s simply impossible to eliminate unconscious desires and behave like the conscious beings we are. But if we can dethrone the ego even a little bit, a world of opportunity emerges. Suddenly we become attuned to the conscious desires within us: those capable of changing the world- or at the very least, our lives- if we had the courage to carry them out.
As we increase our meditation, raise our consciousness, and subordinate the ego, the less powerful our lower desires become, and the more energy we can pour into our noble ones. With practice and regularity, the lower desires can slough away altogether. But that’s an advanced checkpoint along a daring journey which few choose to undertake.
A Story from My Spiritual Journey
For my first two years of college, I was lorded over by highly unconscious desires. I drank heavily and regularly, did plenty of drugs, and despised myself through the process. I wanted friends I didn’t have, confidence I couldn’t fake, and a life I couldn’t create. It was by far the most depressing, confusing and self-loathing period of my life. Those two unconscious years culminated with a magnificently bad acid trip, an experience that scared me so deeply that I experienced a small awakening. Feeling I had no other choice, I swore to myself that I would completely re-design my life.
A new chapter began. For the first time ever, I had the resolve- the burning desire- to slash and burn the inner, egoic dictator that had been dragging me around. I became receptive to the highly conscious desires that already existed within me, begging to be nurtured and realized. And I used that desire to rebuild myself physically, mentally and spiritually, becoming an incomparably happier, more effective being.
Just some of the conscious habits I have built since are:
-Writing regularly as a tool for self-introspection
-Meditating for 90 minutes daily
-Refusing to cloud my consciousness with intoxicants of any kind
-Exercising daily
-Setting purposeful goals for my life
-Adapting my diet to maximize my well-being
-Eradicating self-pity and cultivating gratefulness daily
I relay this story to make a simple point: you need a burning desire to create any meaningful change in your life. I wished a thousand times during those two years that my life would change, but I hadn’t wanted it badly enough until everything around me went to shambles. Faced with no other choice, I became engrossed by the burning desire to change everything. Slowly but surely, that’s exactly what I did.
Complexity Along the Way
Conscious desires are challenging to satisfy, and you’re bound to spar with the ego along the way. One of the immediate inner obstacles I faced was feeling guilty about devoting so much time to working on myself. How would this affect my “friendships”? Was I being too selfish, too idealistic, even vain?
Take exercise as an example. In the aftermath of my awakening, I set the goal of exercising five days a week. By doing so, I hoped to increase my energy, boost my mood, and improve my health.
As soon as I laced up my running shoes, doubt set in. Who do you think you are? Said the voice in my head. You look ridiculous. This isn’t you. On and on went the blabbing ego. Despite the internal hailstorm, I pushed on, again and again. Once I got going, it didn’t matter. It felt too good to stop. Heck, nobody but my ego seemed to mind, anyway.
Almost immediately, some amazing things started happening. With newfound strength and a head full of endorphins, I felt like a new person. With my extra energy, I took my academic performance way beyond my mediocre GPA of 3.2 and earned straight-A’s for the rest of college, graduating cum laude with departmental honors. I also found time and energy to create this blog. And by improving my health, I haven’t gotten seriously sick in over two years. Now two years later, I exercise for a steady six days a week- and often seven, when I’m in the mood.
Oh, and did I mention that I just happened to meet the girl of my dreams along the way? :)
Take a good look at what you aren’t doing because it seems too selfish. In the long run, my more “selfish” choices have been the most positive changes I’ve ever made. Maybe it’s time you admitted to yourself that whatever is truly good for is also good for everyone around you. Are you avoiding something that could bring immense positive energy into the world just because it seems “selfish”?
Some of my most positive, “selfish” desires have included:
-Starting a serious exercise routine
-Undertaking a serious daily meditation practice
-Adapting a diet that makes family meals and eating out more difficult
-Studying what I wanted to study, instead of what others believed I should study (the non-academic equivalent would be leaving a job that simply pays for one which nourishes)
-Exploring spiritual or religious faiths beyond that which I was brought up in
Living a conscious life doesn’t have to be an ascetic journey of starvation and poverty. It’s okay to satisfy the desire to live a fulfilling life insofar as it supports our personal and spiritual growth- if done wisely, it almost always does. It’s when we start making decisions that benefit no one that we fall into a downward spiral.
At the End of the Day….
It’s not about whether or not you have desires, it’s about the content of your desires. It’s about whether those desires give power to consciousness, or hand power over to the ego. If you cultivate consciousness through meditation, highly conscious desires will naturally develop within you. If you ignore spiritual growth and engross yourself in the world, expect to be at the mercy of unconscious desires. The fate of your desires- and therefore, your life- is in your hands.
Take care, my friend, for desire is among the most powerful forces in the universe, and only you can decide whether it will elevate you to sainthood or lower you into hell on earth.
right now, as a young person in this world, our bigest concern should be shielding ourselfs from emf’s. get some emf stones, like the dio med or cell diodes.
[...] As I’ve written about extensively, I started exercising (running and lifting) very regularly at the end of my Sophomore year, which [...]